What does one do with a day like Sunday, when the tectonic plates upon which your worldview sits shift, shaking your beliefs about life and love and soccer to the ground, leaving you nothing to do but to bury your dead, dry your tears, and walk into the vast desert that’s left of your dreams? How does the traumatized mind compartmentalize a day that started with its preferred EPL team (yes, that one) having cup…
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The stumbling Philadelphia Union welcome a New York Red Bulls team riding a three-game winning streak this Sunday at PPL Park. With the Union playing ugly anti-football and the Red Bulls pressuring the Eastern Conference-leading Wizards in the standings, the Union have three ways to win this game: 1. Get really lucky 2. Have key Schalke players impersonate Union players 3. MLS suddenly switches to golf-style scoring The (New Jersey)(Pink)(Dead)(Soda)(Cows)(Bulls) This week, you get to…
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A few shots from the day of the Dead Bulls match. Anybody know any good photographers willing to work for backrubs?

Incisive assessments of the victory of NY, a very worthy soccer-related charity and much, much more. Actually, not that much more. It’s CyberShotz!

The Blue and Gold send a busload of over-caffeinated, overconfident, sad little bitches back to North Jersey with a few emotional scars to show for it. DOOP.

The Cows are on their way, hopped up on caffeine and high fructose corn syrup for a showdown of epic proportions. Can the inoffensive U send them home without any points? Paul and Javi weigh in.

You can now officially plan the next 8 months of your life.

Oh yes. Despite the support of a very well-organized contingent of New Yorkers in the visitor’s section, and a 2nd-half rally of possession and chances, the New York Caffeinated Vodka Mixers were unable to overcome the U.  No surprise there.  With a sold-out PPL  (led by a more-emotional-than-usual River End) behind them, the city of Philadelphia’s most detested (and pathetically corporate) footballing rival in front of them, and a last chance to prove themselves in front of the greatest crowd in…
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Attention all Union fans- obviously the best way to show the most overrated city in the world that Philly means business is to cheer on the blue and gold as they beat the most unfortunately named team in MLS.  But there’s one more way to give our boys the support they live on….make #DOOP the number one trending topic in all of Twitterdom! We have proven, over and over, again and again that Philadelphia has…
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In a match against the New England Revolution, the New York Red Bulls’ Dane Richards charged the goal, and…well…this happened.  It was later confirmed, as if it needed confirming, that GK Preston Burpo’s tibia and fibula were broken.  No shit. New England won 3-2.